Slap me silly with a wet sock

Okay... I just got to know, who the hell are these bitches that are buying these socks?  (especially the dumb ones paying full price) and why aren't they dating me?

Oh wait... it's cause I'm poor.  and have common sense.

Dear Reader,

Should I inherit a crap ton of money, or win the lottery if I EVER do something this stupid, you can slap me with a wet sock.

Yours Truly,
Fifi

White bike shorts

It's a No No.  White pants, yes - well maybe depending on a number of factors: fit, style, he/she who is wearing the pants  But BIKER SHORTS - must never be worn.

because sweaty + ass = not attractive (on anyone)

Marc Jacobs has a clown fetish

really...... I've been a follower of his work. I know he had a penchant for doing coke with his ex-husband, getting naked and doing benchpress(es). I can't even try to rationalize that but... seriously, now that you know... pay closer attention and you will realize he has some kind of deranged fetish with clowns. Case in point:

um hmmm..you need a stylist

Okay, even though I've sworn off all voluntary actions, I feel inclined to help the needy.

Often times I see people in dire need of advice, people crying out for attention, friendless or perhaps vampires (can't see themselves in mirrors) because that is the only explaination for some of the really really bad fashion I see on the streets.

Friends don't let friends embarass the shit out of you in public.

Case in point... this gentlemen above, I'm sure he's a very nice person, and I 'get' the look he was going for. However, it would've looked alot nicer if the sweater vest was less fitted and if he wore bigger pants. Not to mention he had a longer torso, his proportions are off and the look did nothing for him. He was walking with female co-workers to lunch... in public. You'd think his mommy or someone could have pulled him aside and told him not to wear that outfit. I felt sad and really wanted to talk to him, but alas, since I cherish my safety and was pretty damn hungry myself, I let this pass.

England has the best Serial Killers

Seriously, throughout history the motherland (you know to America) and Germany always has the most wackiest and wildest serial killers. Don't get me wrong the old US has had it's fair share of crazies:

• Green River Killer
• Jeffrey Dalmer
• John Wayne Gacy
• Ed Gein (it rubs the lotion on the skin)
• The Zodiac Killer

and NO, Charles Manson doesn't count because he was a mass murderer, thank you. Not a Serial Killer (duh). But I digress. England - something about Serial Killers, Cannibals and Prostitutes I mean, really it's a recipe for disaster. See the CNN article here

Ah well, the more I read about crime, the more I'm hoping that micro-organisms take back the earth or that a Supernova sucks us up. Let the bunnies, kittens and puppies inherite the earth cause humans suck.

Speaking of sucking... three day weekend. I'll be sure to snag pictures of visual attrocities - because it's the beginning of summer (people get drunk, put on clothes in the dark, drink liquid courage to karioke, it's hot, less clothes, people seem to think they are far hotter than actuality) and there's bound to be bad BAD bad fashion. And I'll be there like the caped crusader waiting to strike (and take picture to blog about) so I can defend the rights and eyes of the masses!

Truth is Stranger than Fiction

seriously, you can't make this crap up. This dude, Jarrod Wyatt, drank some wacky mushroom tea and ripped out the heart and eyes of his 21 year old friend. The guy bleed to death after his heart was ripped out of him - WHILE HE WAS ALIVE!! Holy Crap. I shudder to think about this guys last moments. EEWWWW

Now let's access the prepetrator...
1. His name is Jarrod
2. His last name is Wyatt
3. Don't most serial killers have Wyatt or Wayne in their names?
4. What's up with the whacked out hairdo? Please tell me this picture was taken AFTER the mushroom incident because there is NO excuse to walk around looking like this. I mean he should be incarcerated on the fashion crime alone. GUILTY.

Anyways, to read more about this story go to the below link. Oh yeah... one more thing. EWWwwwww......



http://msn.foxsports.com/boxing/story/MMA-fighter-Jarrod-Wyatt-eyes-heart-murder-charge-052610

You had to be there

The lady in the bikini had a rockin body however she wore a white bikini with a pad! A pad! What the what the? You can't see it in the picture but it was BAD! Why would someone do that?

Birth control

Reason number 31 why I don't want kids! What the hell, this dude has pants down his bum, a cap, a baggy hoodie sweatshirt and the hood OVER his cap.

and it's camo.
in the burbs.