Old school memory at the asylum

Remember when you were a kid and popped off to your dad and you came home drunk and high and cops had to be called and you went for an emergency psych eval then three days later was chilling with your pops talking about how you should go snowboarding (courtesy of someone else since you haven't had a job for a year)?

Yeah, I don't remember that either cause if that were me I would've had my ass beat and would be living on the streets. I suspect you might have had the same experience.

I am living on Main Street in Crazytown.  This is some bullshit. I swear when I read this it sounds like some crazy sci fi shit, it can't possibly be real.  But it is.

DC has the worst traffic

It's true.  Perhaps it's not the worst in the nation but its up there.  See..... And some studies have said the DC commute is the worst.

I was driving home today and I swear every student driver and their 80 year old grandmother was out driving.  On top of that, everyone in the DMV decided it would be a great time to hit the road at the same time so there was bumper to bumper traffic on the beltway for a solid ass 40 minutes no joke and there wasn't a broken down car or accident in sight.

I almost flipped the fuck out.  Really.  If I'm sitting in traffic that ain't moving, on a road with no stop light there better be a good ass reason.  I'm talking a circus parade or some shit.  On the bright side, at least it was going home and not going to work.

Fairy tales

1.  Maybe the Evil Queen wasn't so evil.
2.  Maybe Snow White was a little hussy delinquent that got in all kinda of trouble and did all sorts of unsavory things. (She hangs out in the woods with 7 men, 'talks' to animals...  for all you know she was eating wild mushrooms)
3.  What if Snow White killed her mother and perhaps her dad was a love blinded fool (I mean he married the evil queen).
4.  What if the Queen was trying to be a responsible role model, teach her about properly fitting into society and Snow White was a spoiled ego centric entitled a-hole?

I think truth is stranger than fiction.  And that a new version of the story needs to be told.  Don't even get me started on Hansel and Gretel trespassing committing B&E to that little old lady that wanted to be left alone.  Assholes.

no habla espanol, motherlicker!

I'm in a bit of a quandry, seems that being multiethnic has many perks:
kick ass food
funky name
fun possible places to visit
did I mention food? mmm......
exotic looks

It's the last item which is delightful but can be problematic. For instance, say a person looked latina but was not. Imagine the frustration, if you will, of getting asked or spoken to in spanish once a week almost everyweek of your adult life? Imagine again, if you went to latin restuarants and people thinking you are the same ethnic group, saw you with a 'foreigner' and gave you the 'she thinks she's better than us' stink eye. Perhaps making you wait longer or ignoring you... How about being hit on all the damn time by that same group? Which the 'said person' wouldn't mind if they were hotties.... but nay. I get all the 4'2" motherlickers....

NAY, I say.

I guess the most annoying part is when I say that I'm not latin, and identify my ethnicity and people still ask me if I'm sure. I mean, what the F! Are you inquiring if my mother was a whore? hmmm... That I'm an orphaned vagabond that never met my parents? These are the moments I wish I could slap people. I think it would be justified.

the end.