Halloween

Is the gift that keeps on giving!  I scored candy and will score sale candy tomorrow, but it was great cause I stayed home and gave out candy.
no one else was around.
it was quiet.
I ate in silence.

and yes, it was golden.

Rock you like a Hurricane!

There's a nasty storm making it's way up the East Coast but I wanted to assure you that I will be okay.  I've pick up my storm rations and am ready to hunker down:
booze
thin mints
bacon
toilet paper
water

the above list may or may not be in order of priority.  All in all I think it will be okay.   Most importantly, I hope that everyone comes out safe and sound.  Even rat tail dude (from my previous post).

Present 4 U!

I know it's too early for Christmas, but perhaps you can use this as inspiration for your Halloween costume.

You can thank me later.

For those non cosmopolitan folks, this is a Rat Tail (literal and figurative).  The rat tail haircut was prevalent in the 80's, 90's and in certain groups: soccer players and guitarist in hair bands circa 1983-1997.  It is a distant cousin to the Mullet (see below).  This is an exceptional example of a rat tail, as the shape incorporates the look of a rat.  This my friend, is a true piece of art.  I might have peed a little when I saw this.

F U, scale! F U!!!

Someone we all know and love had major dental work done.  It hurt like shit.  Seriously, I thought I flew to London and encountered a gang of skin heads that kick my jaw in.  Non stop ache and headaches for a week.  I'm all tired and bitchy cause I keep waking up at 3/4am from sheer pain.

but the kicker is ... after nearly of week of mushy food the fucking scale has barely moved.  WTF.  I was expecting a 5lb loss.  I'm soooo pissed.

Crazy killer shit

There is truth in old sayings like "truth is stranger than fiction" case in point, story about a chef that is on trial for murdering his wife and boiling her body for days until the only think that remained was her skull.  I mean, holy SHIT!

I can't fathom killing someone... wait.  I can't fathom actually going through with killing someone none the less disposing of their remains.  Murder is a messy business my friends.  That takes commitment and EWWWWWwww.  How can this guys sleep at night?  WOW.

Sticky mess

People are funny.  I'm sure this broad must be HELLA Krazy cause just a mere drawing of a stick figure she sent to someone is threatening.  Hence the extra jail time, bitches! 

Now, take a moment and think about this.  How many times have you seen a stick figure image either drawn by you as a child or by kids, adults or your children?  The last thing I think of is threatening.  In fact my fave stick figures are by Cyanide & Happiness, they are evil and hilarious but not threatening.



Can you imagine the shit she did to get into jail? Makes me shudder to think. 

AWWWwww

In an effort to show that I have a beating heart and I'm not a complete asshole, I wanted to share this luvable fuzzy wuzzy article about a dog fostering a kitten.  I'm not gonna lie, it's pretty damn cute.

Good?  Bask in the warm fuzzy glow that is adorable animals.